Happiness is Sunshine

Sweet, glorious sunshine, oh how I love you! Even though it doesn't snow in California, I finally feel like we are escaping winter and jumping into a warmer season. And considering I'm lucky enough to live in San Francisco and work in Mountain View, I can dress for 80 degree temperatures (and you betcha, I will).

Dinner outside, leaving my puffy jacket at home, flip flop weather is my kind of love. Cheers to spring!

A Lifesaver

I've felt stuck, angry and all amounts of frustrated for the last three years, if not more. The reasons aren't important, and will slowly be dissected and understood as time continues and open communication between various parties finally happen. Life hasn't developed into the dream I had imagined, but maybe this is where I'm "supposed" to be. Who knows, right?

Even though there is a lot that I'm still working on, there's one things that's helped end the late night cry sessions with my boyfriend and the continuous whining to my mother - the gym. It's so cliche, but after a month and a half of a serious, sudden relationship with sweat and sore muscles, I've been able to manage my anger and sadness so much better.

Two spin classes a week, Soul Cycle (yes, it's as amazing and exhausting as everyone claims) and a lot of reading on the Stair Master have become routine. Tonight, as I angrily bang on these keys, I'm excited to wake up at 5 am to make sure I have time to go to the gym before work tomorrow.

I'm ready to be better, physically, mentally, and emotionally this year. Thank you free weights and crazy spin class songs for helping to make this happen!

Results You Want

What's that saying? Two steps forward, one step back? Well, the last few years have felt like two steps forward, two steps back... maybe even three. Jumping back on this blog, I'm looking forward to the results of some recent, positive changes, and hoping to share what I've learned. Growing up and learning about yourself is a continually challenging, painful process, but the potential for joy and contentment is boundless.

In the meantime, reading and the gym totally go hand in hand, am I right?

Slow Down

In college, my motto was work hard, play hard. Between an internship, a job, sorority fun, and oh yeah, school, sleep was always the last on my priority list.

These days, it's work, work and more work. I can't recover like I did three years ago, and my bones ache when I walk home at night from work. I've been tempted to nap at the bus stop. Needless to say, I was so thankful for a three-day weekend where vegging out was the top priority.

A movie, a Dexter marathon, and delicious food and drinks were on the agenda this weekend. College Bethy might chastise current Bethy for not living up every second of the non-computer time, but I'd gladly take it if it meant lazily enjoying and sleeping away every second this weekend. Thankful for a little refresh.

 

Weekend treat. 

I Believe

One of my biggest faults is being too type A for my own good. I can't count the number of arguments I've gotten into with my parents, siblings and significant other because a situation or event didn't work out as perfectly as I expected. This whole learning to let go thing is something I am continually working on, and managing these stressed out, controlling feelings is a big step in helping and healing current relationships with my dearests.

Confession: over. Where is this post going? My boyfriend and I had tickets to see Book of Mormon this weekend. We've been looking forward to this magical Saturday for months. We were told that we had tickets to a "VIP lounge" at 11am, and arrived at 12ish, only to be told that doors didn't open until 1:15. It was cold, rainy and I was sooooo looking forward to a snack and a cocktail. This was the perfect opportunity to freak out at a lack of unwarranted perfection.

I'm proud to say that I fought those feelings and made an equally good, if not better, memory with my boyfriend. We checked out a fancy hotel. We grabbed a drink at a semi-sketchy diner. We managed the hour of free time wonderfully. And absolutely nothing was lost when we finally went into the Orpheum - it was just as beautiful and theatre-y as I expected.

Badgley Mischka's and a pint of beer? Imperfect perfection.

PS: I Believe (a song from the show) has been stuck in my head for two days straight now :)

A New Year, A New Start

2013 was quite the year. A year of struggle, a year of stress, a year of physical pain and a year that I felt sucked all the nice out of me. It wasn't my favorite year, and I've had to dig deep to find the redeeming moments and sunshine-y bright spots. Maybe if I sit with 2013 a little longer, I'll be able to produce one of those splashy "best moments" of 2013 posts. Maybe. But for now, I'm trying to take control of the pieces that have fallen out of my control, build myself into a stronger being that can withstand the harsh, current climate and make healthy the relationships I hold dear.

Cheers to 2014!

From a night that all I did was dance with my family and eat. And didn't give a darn about anything else.

A Few Happys

Bright spots in my week, highlighted below :)  Gotta love little pick-me-ups!

 

Stopped at Michael's after a long day. Sparkly paper for a project, a cute frame and fun clothespin clips got me moving again!

 

Squeezed in a mani Wednesday night. This pic is from Thursday, enjoying my coffee and the bright colors I wore.